I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
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