So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
