so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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