ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Randomize
