i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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