Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Randomize
