dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
