Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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