Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
