She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I lost the right to judge tonight
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
The dick lei will go down in squad history
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
