I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
My butt remains clenched, sir.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
