just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
