Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
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