Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
