What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Randomize
