at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
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