she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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