Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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