NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Randomize
