I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
