Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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