how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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