also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Randomize