We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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