why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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