bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
