Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Your topless pictures make me question reality
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
