you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I am midnight drunk by noon
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Randomize
