I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
