So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
