my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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