Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
Randomize
