Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
