covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
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