dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
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