So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
