There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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