OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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