just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Randomize
