Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize