yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Randomize
