he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Randomize
