I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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