Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Randomize
