when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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