Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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