Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
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