How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
