He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Randomize
