now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Randomize
