Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
